“I’m sorry to have intruded upon your royal domain, Your Majesty.” you say humbly, trying to think up a good story as fast as you can. “It is true, sire, I have been badly mistreated by my wicked stepfather, with whom I live, and I place myself under your wise and just protection.”

“Who is this wicked stepfather and where does he live?” the King asks. “If he is wicked enough, we may want him to be one of our knights,” he adds, laughing, as do all the courtiers.

“He lives beyond that hill,” you say, pointing toward a high wooded ridge, “and his name is Smith.”

The King laughs once again. “Then your step-father must be a fish,” he says, “for beyond yonder hill is Loch Ness.”